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Changes in communication with children during divorce

Divorce can bring some major changes between parents and adults. Everyone in the situation has to try to learn how to thrive despite the new circumstances. One thing that might suffer some is your ability to communicate with your children. This is difficult to handle because it might be a significant difference from what was happening before the split.

You have to try to find a new normal with your children. Before, you probably saw them daily. Now, you might go days without laying eyes on them. You might be able to use phone calls, texts and video chats to keep the lines of communication with them open when they aren't with you.

Try not to lecture a lot. Some situations might require you do have a long talk with the kids, but these should be limited and shouldn't seem like a session of fussing. State your point, name the consequences and explain why they are essential but don't drag it on.

Practice two-way conversations. You need to listen to your children. This enables you to find out what's bothering them and determine how you can help them. You can teach your children how to be active listeners by modeling the behavior to them.

Remain willing to make small talk. Sometimes, children are overwhelmed with the situation and might not want to dwell on the changes. Simply asking about their day or offering to help with homework will mean more to them than having a deep conversation.

It is easier to fall into a routine once the parenting plan is set and everyone knows what to expect. Take the time to get this done, so you can build on your relationship with the kids.

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