All divorces involve conflicts, because there is always some form of tension or disharmony in the marriage that caused the couple to go through a divorce. These conflicts can either be managed strategically and practically so that things can move forward, or fuel can be added to the fire, causing them to grow out of control.
Of course, it’s best to manage these conflicts effectively. The following are some tips for efficiently resolving the conflicts you have with your divorcing spouse throughout the divorce process.
Normalize the conflict
If we spend to much time trying to avoid conflict, we’ll be disappointed and even angry when it inevitably arises. Instead of doing everything you can to resist conflict, accept that it’s a normal part of the divorce process and work with it instead of against it.
Reflect on your own attitudes
Take the time to self-reflect about what you are bringing to the conflict. Perhaps you are bringing with you resentment from things that have happening in the marriage, or maybe you are not willing to come to a compromise because you are determined to get the upper hand.
Think about the goal
Question what your ultimate goal is. Is it to win this particular conflict, or is it to move forward in a positive light and get to the point where you and your ex can jointly parent your shared children? By focusing on the ultimate goal, you’ll be able to get your priorities straight.
If you are going through a divorce and experiencing high levels of conflict between you and your divorcing spouse, you should take action by considering different approaches to divorce.