Learning that your spouse betrayed your marriage can cause a deep pain that isn’t always easy to overcome. It might be the factor that leads to the end of your marriage. If this happens, there are several things that you need to think about as you go through the process.
First, you need to allow yourself to heal. This doesn’t mean that you condone what your ex did. Instead, it means that you aren’t going to let their infidelity rule your life for another day. They made their choice and it is affecting you, but you do have a say in how much you allow it to impact your life.
Second, turn your attention to the practical side of the divorce. You need to get your mind focused on dividing property and making decisions about the children. You can’t let the fact that your ex cheated cloud your judgment for these matters.
Third, make sure you set a plan for taking care of yourself. You may need to have testing for sex-related diseases and infections. Even if you think the other person is in good health, it might be beneficial to do this.
Fourth, take care of the children. This might be a scary time for them. While they don’t need to know all the details about what happened, they do need reassurance that they will still have both parents in their life. They are going to draw off of your emotional reactions, so think about this as you go through the upcoming days.
As part of the divorce, you need to ensure that all documentation accurately outlines the agreements you and your ex made. If you can’t come to mutually agreeable terms, you may need to turn to the court to make those decisions.