Children count on their parents for stability and love. When a child’s parents have been together during a child’s entire life, it can be difficult for the child to adjust to not having their parents together. This is what children of divorce have to deal with. If you are divorcing your child’s other parent, you have to focus on how you can help your child to cope with the major changes.
A divorce can shake a child to the core. The child, especially a younger child, might not fully realize what is going on. They probably don’t know about the issues that led to the divorce. They may not realize that there isn’t going to be a reconciliation.
One thing that you need to do here is make sure that your child knows that the divorce isn’t his or her fault. Children will often blame themselves and think that if they had behaved better, the marriage would have been fine. Don’t let your child self blame regarding the divorce.
We understand that this is hard for you as a parent. Your natural inclination is to protect your children and make them happy. Even if you could stop the divorce, doing so might not be in the child’s best interests because then he or she might be subjected to the unhappiness that could result.
Ultimately, this trying time is one that will take adjustment by you and your child. Finding ways to make it a bit easier for the child could help him or her to cope. In all cases, make sure that you show your children that they are loved and wanted.