When you have children and end up getting a divorce, you will still have to have contact with your ex because of the kids. This isn't something that most people look forward to, but if you take the time to work on having a positive attitude in these cases, you will find that it probably isn't as stressful.
How you handle child custody matters can have an impact on how your children deal with the situation. Your primary goal, at least in the beginning, is to help your children to adjust to the changes that are occurring. Your positive attitude will likely be contagious and can help them to find things to appreciate about the new way of life.
There are times when dealing with your ex isn't going to be pleasant. In these cases, you and your ex should work with each other directly. Don't try to bring the children in as messengers. Not only is having to relay messages between your parents stressful for the child, it also introduces a chance for miscommunication.
We know that you just want what's best for your children. At this point, one of the best things that you can do is try to get the custody matters handled as quickly as possible. This lets your children settle into what will be the new normal, which can help them with their need for stability and consistency.
As you work through child custody matters, don't try to rush too much. You still need to ensure that your rights and your child's rights are protected during the process. We can help you each step of the way.